Friday, September 7

The Four Questions In High Definition

You'll need to spend $4,000 on a new TV set to read today's installment of the Four Questions.

Q. What is Dave wearing?
A. Dave will be taping two segments for teevee later today, so he's wearing a dress shirt and tie. He's also wearing pants. Apparently, people complained the last time he didn't wear those to work.

Q. How does Dave feel today?
A. Dave is a little miffed at the Starbucks people, but overall he is in a good mood.

Q. What are the factors affecting Dave's mood today?
A. Dave ordered and paid for a venti iced cafe con leche with two Splenda, but after waiting for five minutes, he only received a grande iced cafe con leche with one Splenda. Dave's first instinct is to complain (are you surprised), but Starbucks was much too busy and he had already waited too long. He did a quick calculation in his head, and figured the hassle and extra expenditure of time wasn't worth a few extra fluid ounces of liquid. Overall, Dave is in a good mood because he and Britt head to Jacksonville this weekend to visit their nephew, Ryland.

Q. Is Dave worried that John Madden will read the Daily Dave, fly to Tampa, and beat Dave up?
A. Dave is not worried about any such thing happening, because it's a well known fact that John Madden does not fly anywhere. What's more, last night on Sunday Night Football (on Thursday night), NBC told viewers they can go to to track the location of the Madden Cruiser bus around the country. Dave will visit the site regularly. If the Madden Cruiser begins to take an unexpected detour toward Tampa, Dave plans to flee the country. Perhaps Dave will use the alias Juan Madén.

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