Friday, October 12

The Four Questions And The 700 Club

This installment of the Four Questions represents the 700th post on the Daily Dave 2.0.

Q. What is Dave wearing?
A. Dave is wearing a blue dress shirt, a pair of olive green pants, and a blue tie with a stepped geometric pattern. It is a fetching ensemble, inspired both by the runways in Milan and the boardrooms on Wall Street. Or, more accurately, it's a bunch of clothes that were clean and seemed to match.

Q. How does Dave feel today?
A. Dave feels it would be great if he could make it through a day of work without (A) drama; (B) surprises; and, (C) construction crews performing their Symphony in C For Jackhammers And Mallets on the floor directly beneath him. Dave also feels he will be greatly let down.

Q. What are the factors affecting Dave's mood today?
A. If Dave seems a little sullen or contemplative today, it's probably because it's his brother's birthday tomorrow. He and Complementary Spouse Britt Shirley would like to do something appropriate to commemorate Mike's birthday, but haven't yet decided what to do.

Q. How did Dave celebrate National Coming Out Day yesterday?
A. What do you think Dave did -- change into a full-length evening gown, climbed on top of his desk at work, and sang "Somewhere over the Rainbow" in a fine falsetto? Of course not. He went about his daily life, knowing that the best way to defeat bigotry and stereotypes is to just be himself. So of course he didn't sing "Somewhere over the Rainbow" in a full-length evening gown! You should be ashamed of yourself for even thinking such a thing! (He sang "Material Girl" in a sequined cocktail dress.)

No comments: