Thursday, November 29

An Inconvenient Four Questions

Al Gore, on the importance of sending Fry back through time, on an old episode of "Futurama": "If we don't go back there and make that event happen, the entire universe will be destroyed. And as an environmentalist, I'm against that."

Q. What is Dave wearing?
A. Dave is wearing tan chinos and a blue striped polo shirt. He looks like a million bucks, minus taxes.

Q. How does Dave feel today?
A. Dave knows the weekend is imminent, and therefore feels good.

Q. What are the factors affecting Dave's mood today?
A. Dave woke up in the middle of the night and ate a leftover slice of pizza. When the alarm clock went off this morning, Dave didn't recall his midnight snack right away. He was, therefore, quite surprised that his breath smelled like tomato sauce and oregano.

Q. What are Dave's thoughts about incredibly obese people wearing Phat Farm t-shirts?
A. Dave sees one of these people now, wedged into a chair outside Starbucks. Dave wonders if the wearer appreciates the irony.

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